sI can't stand mayonnaise, and when people talk about how they love mayonnaise. I cannot wrap my brain around it. But at the end of the day- it's mayonnaise.
Have you ever found yourself annoyed with someone because they don't have the same preference as you? I once heard a sweet and humorous story of a married couple. The wife would always save the end piece of the loaf of bread to make her husband a sandwich. Begrudgingly, he ate the sandwich. One day he spoke up and asked why she was giving him the end piece. She lovingly explained when she was growing up, she was taught, that was the best part. He then lovingly explained when he was growing up, that was the worst part. She thought she was giving him the best, and he thought she was giving him the worst. They had a different value system. Our value system greatly impacts the way we deal with people. We might respond verbally letting everyone know what's on our mind, or we might harbor ill feelings towards a person. Hopefully, we recognize it's all mayonnaise at the end of the day, but our flesh sure can twist things. When my husband and I got married, we quickly learned something. He grew up in a home where when you misheard or didn't hear someone, you reply with ma'am or sir. I grew up in a home where you replied huh. I soon began to love his response a lot more than mine. It sounded sweeter, but it took a minute to break that part of my raising. In my lifetime I have learned that people are different. Now, that's nothing groundbreaking, but I'm always amazed when people are surprised that people are different than them. Sometimes I surprise myself. We know what we know, believe what we believe, act like we act because of what we have been taught, how we have been influenced, what we believe to be true, and because of our view of God. In other words, our home raisin' ain't the same. (That was painful to type. Clearly, at some point in my life, ain't was established as wrong.) When we assume that everyone else should value our preferences, we've created unfair, and ultimately, disappointing expectations. Side (but important) note: I am not referring to Biblical truths here. Biblical truths are Biblical truths, and God's standards and commandments are without question. Why? Because He created the earth and all that is in it. Whatever standard or commandment He gave is always for our best interest, as being our Creator, He knows what is best for us and desires that. What I am referring to, ultimately, is human preferences and personalities. I am an introvert. It doesn't mean I don't love people. I do. I enjoy being around people, but my idea of quality time and yours might be different. I have friends who are extroverts to the max. They love to be doing, going, seeing, and socializing. All the while, I'm quite content being a homebody, sending snail mail, having a friend over for dinner, or snuggling with my husband and cat, while falling asleep watching a movie. Does this make me right and them wrong? Them right and me wrong? No. If everyone was an extrovert, we'd never get anything accomplished. They'd be too busy doing, going, and seeing. If everyone was an introvert, well, who would keep the economy running? And while we might have differing opinions of quality time, we can still be friends. When building relationships, get to know these things about people. Take the time to observe, and if you're unsure, ask questions. This will help you both to not have disappointing expectations because of an assumption that everyone shares your preferences. It's not an issue of right or wrong- it's different. I value manners. I would venture to say most people do. However we likely all define manners differently. It seems that sometimes people who value manners lose their own manners when someone else doesn't display them according to their definition. Of course, a good southerner might not lose their manners outwardly, but boy that heart will boil. Quite a contradiction when you consider it. Today, I met my husband for lunch, and I overheard a grandmother correcting her grandchild who had begun cutting all of the meat on her plate. Her grandmother explained that was considered poor manners. I, on the other hand, eavesdropping on this conversation, immediately wanted to speak up for the little girl. "Ma'am, someone cut my steak for me until I was about 25, and when they cut it, they cut all of it because no one wanted to sit with me and cut it while we ate (insert laughing emoji)." Her grandmother valued that definition of manners. I, clearly, do not. I could have allowed it to bother me, or I could mind my own flaws. It's not an issue of right or wrong, it's a value of preference. I value being politely asked to do something. If given a task, I value explicit instructions and expectations, as I hate to disappoint. Some people value giving and/or receiving vague instructions. Some value being demanding and receiving demands. We all probably prefer one of those extremes or the other, or perhaps we enjoy a happy medium, but I'm learning that maybe just maybe none are "wrong". Vagueness allows creativity. An artistic personality, gifted with a vague instruction, might have been just been given the spark they needed to carry out a beautiful idea with their own great talents and imagination because of a lack of guidelines. Explicit instructions prevent disappointment. A ruler follower given specific tasks will gladly meet those needs feeling confident that he/she understands the expectation. Asking allows an answer of yes or no. Demanding might lead to a task being accomplished because there wasn't another option. My preference is a wildly tidy house. And when I say I value a tidy house, I value my house being tidy. Your house being tidy or not has zero impact on me. It's totes a personal preference. Perhaps messes don't bother you and you fill that cleaning time with something else you value. Right or wrong? No. Different. And that's ok. You do you, boo. Something I learned a lot about when planning our wedding was, well, planning a wedding. There were so many etiquette things, of which I was unaware, and by my preference, just didn't value. In my mind, at the end of the day, I was going to be married, and wasn't that what a wedding was about? And while there might be truth to that, it doesn't make the preferences of those that value them less than my preference- again, just different. I'm of the burlap wedding era. I remember a friend's mom who was so baffled as to why she wanted to use burlap in her wedding and was quite certain it wasn't ok. Her mom valued tradition (break out the tulle), and my friend valued Pinterest (someone get that girl a burlap sash). I grew up eating off paper plates. It's what we did. I never knew people actually set tables. I legit thought that was a thing that only happened on TV or at Grandma's for Christmas. As an adult, I value the beauty of a set table, but it's not about etiquette at all. It's not an expectation I have. I just like pretty things. At some point in life, I began to value drinking out of a real glass. Water tastes better somehow. I have friends who value plastic cups, and so I keep plastic cups at my house for them. Right or wrong? No. Different. Maybe there are some things in your family unit that you greatly value and are appalled when other people don't. At the end of the day, is it just mayonnaise? I'm going to challenge you with a question in which I've been challenging myself- "Is that a preference?" It's really unfair to press our preferences and strengths on to another human being. And ultimately, the result of that is often two disappointed and upset human beings. It's unfair to assume people should care about the things which matter to you. The reality is people only know what they know. My normal is not your normal. Your normal is not mine. Honestly, who gets to define normal? If you go to the grocery store today, and you interact with a cashier, if you make a new friend and go eat lunch, or if you have a coworker that you see every day, understand that they might do some that ruffles your feathers. Understand that your preferences and personality might be different than theirs, but it doesn't make you right, them wrong, or any other thing. It just makes you different. Satan would love nothing more than to build barriers because of such petty things. Can I be totally transparent? I struggle with this. I have a really hard time with people who aren't considerate with my definition of good manners. I often say I want a shirt that says, "It's not about you" and "Just be Nice". You value what you value because of what you know, what you've been taught, and what you believe. We can model, teach, and respond in a way that teaches things we value, but what I cannot see is value in forcing that expectation/preference on someone else. Why? Because we are flawed. We are the human race that somehow deems we must spray all the things raw chicken touched with Clorox, but we eat raw cookie dough, knowing the risk of salmonella, like it's going out of style. I'm sure there are other examples of our justifications, but this one seems widely relatable. I don't at all think this means we shouldn't share valued preferences with others. I think it's all about our heart and expectation when we do it. There's so much I have learned from other people that I have put into practice because I felt like it was a way to be hospitable and ultimately love others, so there's certainly value in it. Our preferences often skew our judgment and remove love and logic, and our preference isn't greater than someone else's. When you're dealing with a person today, I encourage you (and myself) to remember that person is a human being with blood in his/her veins and a heart pumping in his/her chest, but most importantly, that person has a soul. And that soul is either hell or heaven bound. I would never, ever want my preferences to trump the fact the Jesus loves that human being so much, He gave His life for him/her, and I was gifted the task of telling them about that great love. And outside of the eternal aspect, good gravy, have some humility. And in that humility, we can prevent ourselves from harmful expectations and disappointment as well as the other person. The Jewish culture was incredibly exclusive and set apart. Jesus came, and now understanding a little more about Jewish culture, I see why He wasn't received by some. Jesus came in, and boy did He ruffle some feathers. He wrecked their way of doing things. Many Jews were so deeply lost in their traditions (outside of God's Word) and way of doing things, they missed the Messiah. They missed the best part. Jesus changes people. My preferences never will. (Again, I'm not talking Biblical truths.) Because at the end of the day, it's just mayonnaise.
0 Comments
In the midst of COVID turning the world upside down, I walked into church and saw my high school science teacher. I was amazed to learn her daughter was in college, as surely I was just in college completing my preteaching in her daughter's third grade classroom.
I was overjoyed to have a little piece of home in one of my favorite places. (And still in shock that her daughter wasn't in fifth grade because that could've only been two years ago.) The Lord, in His goodness and sovereignty, started making beautiful things happen. She and a few other girls from my hometown were coming to Auburn. This was close to my heart, as I remember moving from that sweet, little town to this huge town (that people call a small town, and I'm always like you have no idea) as a college student. I remember the people that invested in me, and I remember how God used that time oh so beautifully to mold me. The Lord compelled me to seek out the possibility of a Bible study. And to be honest, me of little faith, I wasn't sure how it would go. I remember that season of life of exams, SI sessions, papers, etc., and it can be a lot. But the Lord proved me wrong. These girls were found fully faithful. They were vulnerable, open, and my heart was overwhelmed as I watched their friendship and was reminded of the friends God gave me in those years that constantly lifted me and challenged me in Him. It was our last night together before they left for the summer, and they wanted to see Jordan's and my wedding video. I was almost in (happy) tears, but I nervous laugh, and our wedding always makes me nervous laugh because I mean all eyes on you. Yikes. I listened as my college pastor walked down memory lane. I rejoiced in knowing that in my college years, I came to know Jesus personally as my Savior. I giggled at the John Deere floor mats that were once in my 1998 Honda Accord. I swooned at Jordan in his tux and the stories of how he constantly served me, even before marriage. And I just stood in amazement. I never wanted to leave my home town. But I reached a fork in a road where it was basically a must as far as college. It. Was. Terrifying. Leaving my hometown ended up with a college major change, new friends, new church, and new life in Jesus. From there, I divinely ended up at a school for internship, where I landed a job, and ultimately met my husband. Since then, I've had the most amazing opportunity to spend my days with amazing kiddos and build relationships with incredible families. My precious church from college merged with another church, and from there, Jordan and I had the opportunity to serve college students. What a beautiful, beautiful ride it has been. As we watched the wedding video, I was just so thankful for people who poured their love of the Lord into me, and I stand amazed at the opportunities He has now gifted me. Yesterday was sweet. One of my dear friends in our college ministry willingly agreed to take pictures to give my Bible study girls a chance to get elegant for the prom they missed because of COVID. As I watched her take pictures, I just couldn't help but praise God for who she is. At a young age, she has committed to the things of God. She loves deeply. She has a big heart for others. She loves Jesus, and it is so evident with the joy that she spills out everywhere she goes, and I was so encouraged and grateful for the opportunity to know her. I sat back in amazement thinking about one of the girls, who ultimately rounded everyone up for the Ruth study, was the daughter of one of my very favorite teachers from high school. When I was in college I had to do a preteaching experience, and I was actually in her classroom, and then now she sits in my living room digging into God's Word. She has the sweetest, most humble heart, and she is willing to hold her friends accountable. I've also heard many stories of encouragement she offers them, and it inspires me. I did not grow up in church, but my grandparents would take us and friends would invite us here and there, and one time we got pretty involved in youth group. Although I didn't know the Lord personally, He used that time in my life to teach me about guarding my heart, and I'm so thankful because He protected me in many ways. During that time, we participated in something called Disciples in Action. Each Sunday, we met together in small groups to go through Scripture that we had meditated on that week. There were many adults who poured into that time. One of those adults happened to be that dad of one of the girls that now sits in my living room. This girl is so smart and committed. She also is willing to do hard things. I think she is courageous and precious, and I know God is going to use her life to minister to many. One of these girls was an absolute stranger to me, and she's a firecracker. She is so bold and just. She is willing to stand up for what she believes in, she loves all things country, and I hear she makes a mean mascot. She has reminded me of the importance of standing firm. When we started the study, we had a party of four, but part of the way in we became a party of five, and that fifth member was the perfect addition. I stood amazed at her ability to carry a conversation and be personable. There's nowhere she goes where she meets a stranger, and she carries herself with a humble confidence. I firmly believe this is a gift that can and will further the Gospel. And so now the happy tears are flowing, as I look back and see these puzzle pieces that didn't make sense to me long ago come together into a thing of beauty. Some of those puzzle pieces were hard, and I didn't want to place them, but I am so glad that God is sovereign. If I had had my way, and if I did what I thought was right, I'm sure I would be in a big ol' mess. But I sit here today, just overwhelmed at salvation, my husband, people who invested in me, the job I get to do every day, and the people that sit in my living room and Sunday school class each week. How wonderful it is to have friends in Jesus. If you're walking through something difficult, I just want to offer a word of encouragement, and I don't at all mean for it to sound insensitive or cliche because I know it to be truth. Jesus Christ takes ashes and turns them into beauty. I've seen this in my life too many times to count, and so I want you to know that as His child, there's hope, and if you don't know Him, you can, and the hope and joy He offers is truly out of this world. This is a phrase I've heard my pastor say often, and each time he says it, I get a fresh perspective.
The Bible doesn't speak lightly or infrequently about this sin. I think this is because God, as our Creator, knows us well. Pride comes in many forms, and sadly it is often overlooked and left alone to fester like a wound. Pride is indeed a lie we believe about ourselves that sometimes causes us to believe lies about others. .I was reminded of this through the account of Haman found in Esther 1-7. Haman had a false belief of himself. He thought everyone should bow down to him. He thought he was above everyone. He was right, and everyone else was wrong- especially Mordecai. The truth is, the only thing that is never wrong is God's Holy Word, and when we, in our very fallible state, determine everyone else at fault, it's time to examine ourselves with God's Word. Sadly, Haman had a heritage of distaste for Jews. A learning that had been passed down. Possible intentionally but perhaps maybe even unintentionally. Let us be reminded of how our actions and words speak to children who one day become adults. What do our words and actions teach them about authority? How will that overflow into their career setting one day? More importantly, how will that flow into their role in their families one day? Haman's pride blinded him. Although Mordecai had done nothing wrong, all he saw was fault. Does that mean Mordecai was faultless? Nah. We all fail, but Haman was consumed. He wanted what he wanted, and as he was driven by his selfish desires, he saw nothing good and became enraged. Enraged to the point of making really poor choices. When we become angry, it is so important to assess that anger. I am a passionate human being. Maybe you are too. That passion is a gift from God, but don't you know Satan would love nothing more than to use it for evil. Sometimes my passion is used to further God's Kingdom, and sometimes I allow it to become a hindrance as it turns into stubbornness, false beliefs, and more. May we be careful with how blinding pride can be. Pride can truly wreck our view of others. Perhaps we become jealous and have distaste that swells into hatred. We should celebrate victories and rejoice with others. Perhaps we disagree with someone, and that turns into disappointment which leads to bitterness which has a strong root. We're called to forgiveness. That's the entire reason Jesus left His throne is Heaven is so that we can have forgiveness through His blood. Because you know what we are? Stinky, ol' sinners, and we do not deserve Heaven. Our sin deserves hell. You might be reading this, and maybe your pride just swelled up in you. How dare she say that? But it's true. Our sin is the reason Jesus came, and we are totally unworthy, but that is what makes Jesus Who He is- Savior of the world, and talk about humbling. He loved you, me, and the entire world enough to take on our sin, so that we can have a relationship with Him and an eternity Heaven. Wow. Isn't that a lie of pride we often believe? We often think we deserve or don't deserve something. Someone does something to us. We get mad. We begin to believe lies about them. Bitterness grows. And it's quite an endless cycle. Endless until we forgive. Side note: I know the phrase "Everything happens for a reason" is very cliche, but can I tell you something? God is quite intentional. And although he doesn't cause things to happen, I believe He is omnipotent which means He can stop things which means He allows things. Always for our own good and His glory. What a different perspective we might have if we looked at every opportunity, whether it appear good or bad to us, as a divine opportunity. Look at Esther. She was in a position she culturally shouldn't have been in, but God made a way and USED her. Look at Haman, he believed lies about himself. He exalted himself above others putting others beneath him. Pride. What if instead of sin, we chose (with the Holy Spirit's help) holiness? Who can I share the Gospel with because of this hard thing? What is God trying to teach me? God very well might be protecting me from something. God is omnipotent and omniscient, therefore, this hard thing must be the right thing. (Which I could get into a whole tangent on lies we believe about God causing us to have pride, but what is important to know is that He is the Creator of the universe. He created you. He knows ya well.) Whose life will be better because of this tragedy?. I messed up, but I know it's nothing that God can't redeem. What lesson can I learn? Now, none of those are a humanly possible response- ONLY with Jesus. Isn't it wonderful to have the Holy Spirit residing in you to help with such a thing. If you don't know Christ personally, I'd sure love to tell you more. Pride never lifts us up. It only brings us down. This is quite evident in Haman's life. 13 The fear of the Lord is to hate evil: pride, and arrogancy, and the evil way, and the froward mouth, do I hate. Proverbs 8: 13 5 Evil men understand not judgment: but they that seek the Lordunderstand all things. 6 Better is the poor that walketh in his uprightness, than he that is perverse in his ways, though he be rich. Proverbs 28:25-26 18 Pride goeth before destruction, and an haughty spirit before a fall. Proverbs 16:!8 Perspective in an interesting thing. We recently had bad weather in Alabama. It was predicted to be really bad. We've had our fair share of devastating tornadoes, so of course people get a bit scared. Well, good news, it didn't get as bad as they had predicted. And wouldn't you know it? People got mad that the weather didn't get bad. Yes. Reread that. People got mad that the weather didn't get bad.
Rather than rejoice in the fact that people were safe, houses weren't damaged, and lives weren't turned upside down- people got mad at the meteorologists. I get it. We too overly prepared and lost sleep, but you know what? I prayed. I asked God to protect us. I asked God to make the weather better, so as far as I'm concerned, He answered my prayer. It's all about perspective. 2020 and 2021 have been interesting years. Both years have provided countless worldwide opportunities to be in a bad mood and experience sadness. Sometimes, I think we're looking so hard for the next big thing, that we miss out on the little things that really add up to bigger things. Hear me out. God is a detailed and thoughtful God. Look at every detail He put into His creation. For instance, have you ever thought about plants? A little bitty seed turns into something that can be eaten or maybe pretty to look at. They all are a part of the process of the air we breathe. Have you ever thought about breathing? Lungs. Wow- they're useful, and out bodies make them function without us thinking about it. Pretty neat. The ocean. Woah. There's an entire world going on down there, and it's pretty cool. What a testament to God, and His thoughtfulness in His creation. That kind of stuff doesn't happen on accident. Only could a divine Creator make so many systems work in order the way He did. And in those systems, there are many blessings. This morning, the sun rose, the melatonin in my body lessened, I awoke, and I put two feet on the ground. I was breathing. I rolled over and hugged my healthy husband. I petted my ornery, but so very loved, cat, I had hair and teeth to brush. I was kept safe from bad weather. My house was in tact. I lifted my head from a comfy pillow. I walked into my kitchen where I admired this beautiful rug- like it's everything I wanted in a rug, and I found it AND paid for it with gift cards gifted me. Delighting in God is one of the greatest joys of being His child. I don't believe in luck. I don't believe in superstition. I believe in a thoughtful, intentional God. When we delight in the little things around us, we realize how big He is. I thank and praise Him that I get to be His child. I thank Him because He has forgiven me of my Sins and saved me from Hell, and I get to spend eternity in Heaven with Him, but I also praise Him because I get to walk this earth with Him. This is earth is hard, but because I know Him, and He gifted us with His Word, I know His character. In Genesis, I learned that He created this world, and when He created it, it was perfect. There was no death. There was no sickness. There was no heartache- there wasn't even thorns. But sin. Sin brought the curse of death and a whole lot of heartache with it. But God. God in His intentionality and thoughtfulness knew we would fail Him, so He, at the beginning of time had a plan to pay the wage of our sin- Jesus. Because of those truths above, I get to delight in Him, and I am so thankful. I am thankful for the way He painted the beautiful sky. I'm in awe of the beautiful flowers and plants He gifted us with to enjoy. I'm so thankful that He made my heart beat all by itself because He surely knew I wouldn't remember to tell it to. I love those little nuggets like finding the perfect chandelier of my dreams at just the right price, and those days I definitely don't leave my house on time but somehow supernaturally to make it to work before being late. There's so much in this world that points to God. There's so much in this world that distracts us, but when we set our eyes on Him, wow we can have a perspective shift. When our eyes are on the eternal, it's a lot easier to exist. (This is also why I'm quite passionate about understanding Biblical creation and apologetics. We need this so much.) Lord, please help me and the person reading this to delight in You. Help us to see the beauty and Your goodness all around us, and I pray we rejoice in that. God, it is a delight to be Your child, and I pray that people that don't know you see that in us, and I pray we enjoy that delight so much that we aren't ashamed to share that with others. God, You have made my life oh so special, and I just want everyone else to experience that. What a sad thing if we kept it from others! I pray we delight in You and are intentional about Your business. Ooh wee, I love You, Lord. “Delight thyself also in the LORD; and he shall give thee the desires of thine heart.” Psalm 37:4 For a long time, I thought that verse meant if I do what God wants me to, He'll give me what I want. Now, I understand that delighting in Him results in walking closely with Him, and it isn't at all about Him giving me what I want. It's all about Him lining my heart up with His, and helping me to want what He wants for me. You see, God's perspective is eternity. He entirely knows the end result of every decision we make. Look at the Israelites. He knew them better than they knew the back of their hands. Did they walk through some tough stuff? You bet ya, but God always had a plan to redeem and restore them unto Him. How many times did God tell them to do things that didn't make sense? That were countercultural? That left them scraping their heads? Countless. How on earth could digging holes and filling them with water defeat an army? What about walking around and blowing a horn? Yeah- those don't seem like the best war tactics, but God's ways aren't ours, and thank God, because my perspective isn't always eternal, and I sure don't know how everything plays out. Also, if I was God I would be zapping people from Heaven when they get mad at meteorologists for something totally out of their control. Good news is I'm not God. God is God, and I am SO glad. Because walking with Him has given me the most joy filled and peace filled life even in the midst of heartache and chaos. His peace truly does surpass all understanding. Ok, so I think I got off track a little, but maybe someone needed to read (insert shrugging emoji). Bottom line, perspective is a funny thing. Out of perspective comes many things. Joy or a lack of joy. Empathy or a lack of empathy. Peace or a lack of peace. And the list goes on. Now, don't get me wrong. We're human. There's spiritual warfare. There will be bad days, but what I can tell you, is when God said becoming His child brought new and put the old things away- He wasn't kidding, and I'm just thankful He did that for me. If you're finding yourself unfulfilled with what you're striving for or angry at the meteorologist (sorry... it's a soapbox of mine), I ask you first, do you have a relationship with the Lord? Has there been a moment in your life that you recognized your sin and your need to be forgiven for your sin understanding that Jesus Christ died to pay that debt? He lived a perfect life, died on a cross, and rose on the third day. Did you know He did that? Did you know He did that for You? Have you confessed your belief with Your mouth and believed it in Your heart? If that is something you've personally done, my next question is, are you delighting in Him? I've passed countless people recently, and these words are often exchanged, "This weather is amazing!" "It's about time."
The funny thing about weather is it comes in seasons, and as I went for a walk today, I thought about how motivating the weather was to get outside, and then I saw a pile of wood, and I thought aw man, I'm going to miss building a fire weather. Have you ever been in a season just looking to the next one? Maybe you're looking to the next one with excitement. Maybe you're ready to leave this one because of heartache. Whatever season you're in, I challenge you to soak it in. Are you in a season of sowing? A season of harvest? A season of growth? A season of change? Jim Elliot once said "Wherever you are, be all there." Those words seem incredibly wise, but at times, they sure can be difficult to live. In difficult times, it's so easy to not be all there. If I'm being honest with you, I often avoid difficulties. Like if it's a sad part in a movie, you can bet I am fast forwarding it. But I think about Job. A righteous man that experienced incredible heartache and still stayed true to God. Have you ever watched someone go through a difficult season? Sometimes I wish I could press the fast forward button for them. And while it's so hard for our finite minds to understand, God does know the big picture, and whatever we experience in this life, He can work it for good. I've often heard people ask why a good God can allow bad things to happen. It's a tough question. It's also one of the reasons I am so passionate about a Biblical worldview. God created a perfect world, but sin. Because of sin, we have death. Because of sin, we have thorns. Because of sin, there is heartache. I can tell you this. I'm so thankful for a God that doesn't give up on me when I give up on Him, and I'm so thankful for the people He has given me to walk with on this earth. If you're in a tough season, I hope you have people loving on you in Jesus Name, and if you don't I'd sure love to. I don't know what God has for you in this season, but whatever it is, He wants to hold you and love on you. If you're heading into an exciting season, don't miss out on what God would have you to experience in this season. When I headed home from my walk, I saw this plant, and 2 Corinthians 5:17 came to mind. Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away: behold, all things are become new. Me without Jesus would never find good in bad. Me with Jesus knows that His ways are higher than mine, and I'm thankful for the new life He brings. When you get down to the root of it, assumption is a foolish thing.
Assumption removes logic and love. We assume we know, and they don't. We assume we don't know, and they do. We assume they have the knowledge and resources we have. We assume we don't have the knowledge they have. We assume their knowledge is better. We assume our knowledge is better. We assume they're angry. We assume they know why we're angry. We assume we're right. We assume they're wrong. We assume we understand. We assume they understand. We assume an explanation is required. We assume an explanation isn't required. We assume and believe things that are not truth. In all my assuming, I've learned that God's Word is the only truth with which I can firmly stand. I am flawed. People are flawed, but God's Word is a firm, firm foundation. And when I found myself in confused, assumed situations, I'm reminded He is not the author of confusion, and His word sheds a lot of light on the untruth and darkness that comes with assumption. Once, I saw an interaction of two friends who were talking privately, and when I showed up, they stopped. My first assumption was that they were talking about me. And maybe rightfully so. I felt like a balloon that had lost its air. I cherished one of these friends to the utmost. When I got home, my roommate could tell I was deflated and asked what was going on. I explained, and she stopped me in my tracks by saying, "Linz. Step back. Is that her character?" This question resounds in my heart each time my feelings get hurt because of assumption. I had allowed something I perceived that was happening to remove logic. That absolutely was not that person's character. I assumed they were talking about me, but I didn't assume the other person had a hardship going on in our life and she was confiding about it to my friend and wasn't ready to make it public knowledge. I didn't assume that maybe it was simply something that was none of my business. I didn't even assume it was a surprise for me. Logic left, and I forgot WHO my friend was. Assumption brought in all sorts of doom and doubt. Have you ever met someone that belonged to a certain crowd, lived a certain way, or even went to a certain church? Because of whatever people's affiliations, we often assume a lot about them. (Now, fair enough to say that sometimes people gain reputations on their own accords, however, it will never be my place to decide things about people that I've not experienced firsthand, and even then, I hope I love them through it.) You know what happens when we assume things about people? Love leaves. Think about it. We've decided something about them, and perhaps we don't like that decision we (unfairly) made, and so now we've put up a barrier. Once, I read an article about something people believe. Which lead me to read more articles on the issue. The articles ripped me, as a person, to shreds. Again, I was a balloon without air. From that moment on, I thought everyone who had any tie to that article thought the same thing about me, and I put up all kinds of walls. Love left. I was angry at people I had never met, and I was angry I people I called friends. I assumed a lot about a lot of people and quickly found myself with a root of bitterness. Jesus grabbed a hold of me, and I learned quickly that my assumptions were so wrong, and that my assumptions were causing a lot of destruction internally/spiritually. I'm a tender soul. Boy, am I tender. Sometimes there is great beauty in this, and sometimes there is great heartache. I can be so in tune with people that I notice things that might be overlooked, but I also wayyyyyyyyy (ayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy) overthink. With overthinking also comes a lot of assumption. And as mentioned above, with assumption comes heartache, lost logic, lost love, and a great potential for bitterness. The Lord has taught me so much in this area, and I still have so much to learn. He has taught me that He never assumes because He knows everything. I'm not God. I don't know everything, and therefore I shouldn't assume that I do. Instead, I should be intentional and show that person the same mercy He has so graciously bestowed upon me. He has taught me that I've caused myself a whole lot of heartache by assuming things about, and reminded me time and time again about Philippians 8:9 and thinking on things that are true and lovely. How easy it is for my mind to dwell on things I assume- not know- are true. He has taught me that I should either confront those things head on, lovingly- no doubt, or move on. It's not fair to be upset with someone because of something you've assumed because chances are, they are totally unaware you're upset or that they've done anything at all/ you're treading dangerous ground in the realm of bitterness and unforgiveness. God also frequently brings 2 Timothy 1:7 to my mind. Assumption can lead to an incredibly unsound mind, and that is not of the Lord. Assumption could also be assuming we know everything. Assumption could be assuming that we're right or our way is best,, totally overlooking our own flaws but seeing everyone else's. That lies on the dangerous ground of pride. Assumption might risk someone's eternity. In the south, usually, everyone knows about Jesus, but they might not know Him personally as their Lord and Savior Who loved them enough to die for their sins. James 2:19 says "Thou believes that there is one God; thou does well: the devils also believe, and tremble." Assumption removes the consideration of others. So many people are walking through things of which we are unaware. Who knows what happened before they walked out the door? Who knows what physical, emotional, or spiritual battle they're facing? Hurt people often hurt people, so rather than assume offense, let's show love. We might assume things about people and therefore never take the time to get to know them or their story. We assume things, and we miss out on an opportunity to share the Gospel. We assume and don't share truth. We assume and sever relationships. May we not allow assumption be a destructive force, but rather stand on truth. Anyone else love a good organization hack? I am a little nutty about labeling things. I don't know why, but I think I have a complex- ha! Quarantine was a perfect opportunity to label all the things in our pantry, and I went on a few organization sprees from there. The latest was my gift box. When I say this was a game changer, it definitely was for me, but. again, I love a good organization opportunity! If I'm out an about and find a good deal on something I think would be a cute gift or have someone in particular in mind, I might snag it, and store it in my gift box. Over the years, it has become so unorganized and difficult to navigate to the point that I don't utilize it. The other day I asked my husband to get something out of it for me, and when he finished, he was sweating. He jokingly suggested inventorying it, but I thought it was a genius idea, so I did! This inspired me to remember something that had once inspired me. If you follow Danielle Walker on social media, you might have seen her deep freezer. She has dry erase boards on the outside where she keeps them inventoried. I don't have a deep freezer, but our regular freezer is narrow and deep, so things often get lost and forgotten. I created a document and laminated it, so I could use dry erase marker on it. I hung it inside the cabinet door nearest the freezer, and I went to town! I'm excited to not lose things in the freezer, but I'm also totally excited to use this in helping with meal planning. Each week, I make my plan, and my precious husband will stand at the freezer while I cal things out to see if I need to add them to the grocery list. I'm hoping the list makes my planning more strategic. Something else I love is a good list. When I do my Saturday cleaning, I can become somewhat overwhelmed with all the things, so a list does my heart good. It helps me to stay on track, because I can start to wander from thing to thing. There's also something so satisfying about accomplishing a to do list! Each week I rewrite it, but I figured why not print and laminate one of those too! You can access all of those documents here. A big thanks to KG fonts for making things cute! The other thing that has been a game changer in our home is "The Calendar".
I once used this to meal plan for the month. I loved it! But then I wanted to repurpose it for this idea, but I highly recommend both. I teach, so during the school year, things can get a bit hectic. Also, I cherish the weekends to enjoy time with family and friends and to rest! However, most Saturdays are spent getting my home back in order, grocery shopping, etc. A friend shared a cleaning scheduled she saw online with me, and yet again, I was inspired. I made categories for prayers and praises, food ideas (to make meal planning easier), indoor chores, outdoor chores, fitness ideas for each of us, and monthly events. I started with the mindset of a cleaning schedule, but the other things seemed great too! Obviously we can pray for anything at anytime, and God might lay something or someone specifically on your heart, but the idea of having specific things to intentionally pray about was so appealing to me. I went/am going through an autoimmune disease journey, and physical therapy was a big part of that when I created the calendar. I will say that I haven't stuck to the plan, but I still love the idea- ha! I'm not always the best at keeping up the daily chore idea, but when I do, it's so nice to have a Saturday without cleaning. It also reminds me to do things I don't always think about. If you're a lover of organization, I hope this makes your heart go pitter patter. If you desire more organization, I hope this inspires you. If you see this and begin to compare, I hope you don't. I don't do all of these things to fruition always. Life happens, and sometimes I plan a meal but picking up food is just way more desirable. Some weeks, my house doesn't get dusted. And that's ok too. These are just ideas that have helped me along the way, and I hope they can be a help to someone else! But if organization isn't your jam, know that I didn't choose this life, it chose me haha! I wish I could let go of it more often that I do. It's all about balance. |
Author
Saved by God's amazing grace and living this divinely put together puzzle of a beautiful life He so graciously blessed. Archives
March 2020
Categories
|