As I was finishing up dishes, putting away dinner, and starting laundry after getting home way after 3:05, I decided I needed a brain break, so I pulled up the ol' Social Media and mindlessly began scrolling.
While scrolling, I found "31 Teacher Memes We All Relate To". Well of course I had to look at them. I found myself relating to all of them, and I giggled. Then I saw one that said "Teaching, the only job you can hate and love at the same time." That really struck me. I guess at this point I should explain the title of this post is clearly false, but that silly meme really got my brain rolling. (Meanwhile, the ones about the helicopter parents, repeating directions after having just given them, and faculty meetings being cancelled had me rolling - I'm just keeping it real.) There are days I come home mentally, physically, emotionally, and verbally (is that even a thing?) exhausted. After those exhausting days, I spend my evenings grading papers, trying to come up with lesson plans, searching Teachers Pay Teachers or Pinterest for the next greatest idea or strategy, and/or trying to just cope. Sometimes, more often than I would like, I catch myself being very overwhelmed and only remembering the negative of the day. Engaging, managing, teaching, learning, helping, and loving 20+ children can wear you down. Changes in curriculum, standards, procedures, picture day, full moons, and whatever else can wear you down. Parents who have children that do no wrong wear you down. Grading papers, filing papers, professional development, seeing all of the great things everyone else seems to be doing better than you, behavior plans, emails, data, getting to work at 6:30pm and leaving at 6:30am, and testing will wear you down. Wondering how on earth other people do the same job you do and do it so much more efficiently and competently (and some of them have children, multiple children, and a dog, and maybe a cat, and they have super clean house and constantly folded laundry, and I'm over here like I have a Cabbage Patch doll, and some frogs that hang outside my house, and they take care of themselves) will wear you down. I'm worn. And in the midst of it all, I absolutely love my job. Clearly I do. I can't see spending 65+ hours a week doing something I don't enjoy. Like I said, I've often caught myself in the pity boat, and as soon as I'm out of it I regret it because I do give the impression that I don't enjoy my job. Despite popular belief, we don't color and play (nor do we work 7-2... sorry I'll get off that boat), but I do get to spend my day with the coolest people. You see children are pretty neat. They don't know about bills, and other adult things yet. They're just worried about multiplication. They're forgive and forget. Bandaids fix their biggest problems. They don't see skin color- they see human beings. They laugh at your jokes but not at you. They pass gas, and they go on with life. They're just great. Every single day I get to meet 20+ young and impressionable human beings. I really can have an impact on their life. I don't have to go searching for opportunities- they sit right in front of me every single day. Every single day I have children who come from the most amazing homes. Their parents love them, encourage them, discipline them, hold them accountable, help them, read with them, help them with homework, feed them, and clothe them. Those same wonderful parents send supplies at the drop of a pin and offer help whenever it is needed. Every single day I have children who come from situations I know nothing about. I don't know what they left that morning, or what they'll go home to that night. Every single day, I love all of those children described above. From the child who cries because he/she doesn't want to disappoint his/her parents with a B instead of an A, to the child who left home without breakfast and will go home to care for him/herself, they're all important. Yes, the time I spend outside of school preparing for the days ahead often overwhelms me. There are days I wonder if I can go back the next day and do it again, but praise God for the children. They make every day worth it. Their unconditional love, intelligence, desire to be better, love of recess, laughter, and smiles make every day worth while. On the days I forget (and in the midst of it all, I'm keeping it real again, it's easy to forget, but remember it's ok to be a mess... there's a blog post about that too- feel free to check it out) , I hope I remember that I do enjoy this job. It's more than the present... it's all about loving a child and hopefully changing a life- for the better. Thank You Lord for an opportunity to be a light for You. In a public school, I may not be able to proclaim Your Name, but I pray they see You in me.
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Yellow Car Boy has thousands of qualities I adore, but if I had to pick a favorite it may be his thoroughness.
Hanging pictures with him is a sheer art. All kinds of gadgets are used. Reading things- oh he's the best! He sees things I skip over and proofread a like no other. When he helps me sweep, he's so precise. When he cooks, he checks the meat temperature the exact way you're supposed to. When he measures, he never rounds. Nope. Get it to the nearest sixteenth. And in all things, he does them well. I can always count on him to have completed a task correctly, by the rules, to the tee, and above my expectations. God sure surpassed my expectations for a husband in this husband of mine. I'm so thankful Yellow Car Boy is thorough. I was the child that required few spankings. Actually, I only recall having two. All my momma had to do was look at me, and I broke. I broke into about 1,000 pieces, and it was hard to put me back together. I aimed to please, and I hated to disappoint. The emotion of disappointment is one that is almost incomparable. I don't know if it's harder for the person experiencing it or the person that caused it. I have experienced much disappointment in my life. I've been disappointed in family, friends, grades, experiences, and myself. I've been let down and I've let down. And through it all, God still remains. I used to love to sing and play this song "Through the Fire", and my favorite line was "When I cross over Jordan, I'm gonna scream. I'm gonna shout. I'm gonna look into Your eyes and see You never let me down." I've experienced some heartaches in my life, and I've wondered why. I've watched loved ones and loved ones of loved ones be absolutely devastated. I've seen people look at God and ask why, and I don't know the answer. But I do know God has the answer. In all His greatness, sovereignty,and eternality, He has a grander plan. People will disappoint. God will open His arms and welcome us. God will be present. God will care. God will mend the broken heart. God will forgive. God will be patient. God will be glorified. We may never know the answers here on this earth. And I can only imagine what it will be like in Heaven. How exciting and healing to fall at the precious feet of Jesus. No tears, no heartache there. Comfort one another.
We aren't appointed unto wrath but to obtain salvation. His children are are not of darkness. Be sober and watch. comfort one another. This world, at times, makes me scared. I find myself filled with fear, but I am reminded God hath not given me a spirit of fear, but of a sound mind, power, and love. This world, at times, makes me scared to bring a child into it, but I am reminded that children are an heritage of the Lord. This world, at times, seems hopeless, but I am reminded where my eternity lies, and I am comforted. This world, at times, has me selfishly desiring the Lord's return, but I'm reminded there are many who aren't saved, and I'm reminded that God can use me as a vessel because the Lord will come like a thief in the night. This glorious occasion is described as a mystery (1 Corinthians 15:51; Ephesians 3:4-5). Are you ready? If you read nothing else, know that Jesus died for you, and He loves you so much. Whatever you feel is unforgivable, His blood can cover it, and He wants to welcome you into His family with big, open, comforting arms. All you have to do is know you're a sinner in need of the Savior, ask for forgiveness, repent, and be saved. As I've studied the Rapture and Second Coming, I've been very aware of the fact there are many lost souls, and I keep asking myself what I'm doing to help people come to His saving grace. Am I showing His love when I'm at work, driving down the road, in the grocery store, going through the drive through, on the days I'm quite sleep deprived, when I see a need even at a time that's inconvenient for me, etc.? Am I telling people about Jesus? Uh oh. Here comes the offensive boat. I have so often found myself getting caught up in worrying someone will be offended or reject Jesus, and so I just don't share. Here's the deal. Option A: I can either tell people and they just may come to the Lord right then, or it just may be a seed planted for later on, and they may get to spend eternity, in Heaven, praising God. Option B: I can stay in my comfort zone, keep my mouth closed, and they just may spend eternity in hell, and that blood is on my hands. Am I teaching people about Jesus? And here's round two of the offensive bus. We all love to hear about the love of God, and my my don't we have plenty to talk about! I'll never wrap my brain around how He can love us in such a way He divinely creates our bodies to heal themselves of scrapes and such, and He sent His Son to die for our sins although Jesus was faultless and we're plum full of faults. It's just unfathomable! However, God is a God of wrath. His precious Word was given to us to learn from, and we're picking and choosing the parts we like and don't like. We're putting our own personal opinions and biases and leaving God out. We have to stop. We must become stewards of His Word, rightly dividing (digging, disecting) It. (Ouch- holler back to myself.) Christ told us to go into ALL nations and TEACH them to observe ALL things which He has commanded us. Discipleship is vitally important. Feet that are firmly planted are crucial. Am I being eternally minded? Y'all sometimes I get so stuck on the here and now. All I can think about is what I'm going to eat next and which outfit I'll wear tomorrow. All the while, there are people in this world who have no idea what they'll eat tomorrow or the next day, and clothes certainly aren't a priority. I get so wrapped up in my job that it takes priority over my walk with God. I despise admitting that, but it's true. I'm not saying we can't enjoy food, clothes, and even work, however, are we thankful? Are we glorifying God in it? Am I looking for tomorrow, or am I looking to eternity? When Yellow Car Boy and I discuss children, my tummy gets in all kinds of knots. I firmly believe it is the parents' job to guard the child's heart as much as possible. When that conversation arises, oh the ridicule that follows. Some of my favorite lines- "You can't put them in a bubble." "They won't be prepared for the world." In my head I think: "Who needs a bubble when you have Jesus?" "Good, I don't want them prepared for the world." "We don't even have children yet." "Would exposing them to all the world has to offer be better, you think?" I'm no parenting expert- clearly we have no children/I'm an expert at nothing besides eating sweets (if you can be an expert at that), but I largely desire to have a child that furthers the Kingdom of God over one that pushes the corporate ladder. I do want educated and successful children, and I think there's a great way to accomplish both. However, eternity is much longer than this short life on earth, and what we feel God leading us to is what we'll need to do. (I think I may have gone off on a soap box- I apologize.) This is one of those posts where I'm not entirely sure I conveyed what I wanted to, and I'm fearful parts can be misinterpreted, but my point is- Jesus is coming. Whether it be right now, tomorrow, 100 years or 10,000 years from now- He's coming. And we, His children, need to share His love, His Word, His grace, and Gospel message in all ways, everyday, every where. What's hindering us? 1Th 5:2 For yourselves know perfectly that the day of the Lord so cometh as a thief in the night. 1Th 5:3 For when they shall say, Peace and safety; then sudden destruction cometh upon them, as travail upon a woman with child; and they shall not escape. 1Th 5:4 But ye, brethren, are not in darkness, that that day should overtake you as a thief. 1Th 5:5 Ye are all the children of light, and the children of the day: we are not of the night, nor of darkness. 1Th 5:6 Therefore let us not sleep, as doothers; but let us watch and be sober. 1Th 5:7 For they that sleep sleep in the night; and they that be drunken are drunken in the night. 1Th 5:8 But let us, who are of the day, be sober, putting on the breastplate of faith and love; and for an helmet, the hope of salvation. 1Th 5:9 For God hath not appointed us to wrath, but to obtain salvation by our Lord Jesus Christ, 1Th 5:10 Who died for us, that, whether we wake or sleep, we should live together with him. 1Th 5:11 Wherefore comfort yourselves together, and edify one another, even as also ye do. Sometimes I giggle to myself when I see those shirts that see "Jesus loves this hot mess". I just relate on so many levels. Well on two at least. I know with all my heart Jesus loves me, and I'm a hot mess most minutes of the day.
I teach third grade. All teachers know, but elementary teachers know all too well, the art of multitasking. People say it isn't really a thing, but it just is- trust me. There's nothing like redirecting a child, filling out a nurse form, finding lost papers, explaining why that e is silent and that one isn't, all while reading a great story and applying character traits. With Pinterest, Teachers Pay Teachers, and cute hall displays, it's easy to feel like what you're doing isn't ok. Except see, teachers are never ok with things being ok. We typically have that terrible diseas to please. But that's for another day. So it's a little humorous because it's very, very easy to be a hot mess in all the multitasking, but you're never ok being a hot mess because well, that's not ok. The truth, however is, sometimes I lose my checklist (that's a terrible way to start). Sometimes I forget to click the button to turn those lengthy lesson plans in, and it looks like I'm flying by the seat of my pants even though I finished them a week ago (yeah that happens once in a blue moon). Sometimes Tuesday folders go home on Wednesdays. Sometimes I forget to tell the child who didn't do his homework, or whatever else, to sit out at recess, and he enjoys ten minutes of feeling like he fooled the teacher. Sometimes I say the absolute wrong thing. Sometimes my lesson plans might as well have been thrown out the window. Sometimes I don't have cute chevron designs and fancy writing on everything. Sometimes I forget to make copies. And what I'm finally learning is it's ok. It's ok if every detail of every day is not Pinterest "perfect". It's ok if every once in a while if a lesson just flops. It's ok. I'm a firm believer in Colossians 3:23. And whatsoever ye do, do it heartily, as to the Lord, and not unto men; So often I find my desire to please shift away from seeking to honor God and instead wanting to be Pinterest "perfect". I'm finally stepping back and ask myself what all the hours are going in for. Am I doing this to honor God? Help a child? Or am I doing this because oh dear that bulletin board really puts mine to shame, and now I need something cute? Oh no, that book is probably better than the one I'm reading, let me change my lesson plans and find a blog or a great TPT purchase? One of my favorite parts about teaching is the relationships I get to build. Every day kids come to me and leave. I never know what they came from or what they're going home to, but every day I pray they leave knowing I love them. I hope they learn math strategies and reading skills, but I really hope they learn how to be productive citizens. I hope they learn so much! However, I can't imagine that they'll remember the perfectly laminated task cards and poster as much as how they felt each day. Clearly academics are important- don't get me wrong. The Good Lord knows I spend enough time planning. Some days I wonder if even make minimum wage with the hours put in. Also, nothing wrong with a cute this and that! Sometimes I can't help myself but to add a little chevron pizzazz! Where I'm at fault is the pressure I put on myself in keeping up with Jones' teacher (you'll catch that in a minute). Dear teacher, please know I hard core believe you should give your all. There are 20+ precious lives you get to impact in a negative or positive way. Your time is short with them, but your influence can be long. However, cut yourself some slack. It's ok to not be Pinterest perfect. It's ok to not stand out (yes, I said it). At the end of the day, did you honor God? Did you love your students? Did you give your best? Teachers cannot help but to go over and beyond. But it's ok to give yourself a break. It's ok to not color code your calendar. It's ok to have a hand made poster. It's ok to make copies right before you need them. It's ok if you brought your teacher bag home and went to sleep instead of grading those papers. It really is ok to not be Pinterest "perfect". The only perfection that ever has been was Jesus Christ, and we are not Him. Let Him carry those burdens. Let His love shine through you, so you can help to mold those precious, young lives. It's ok. |
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